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Guang Zu's 4th Bday!!

i give up

i give up....

on your reason of "past disappointments"

on the excuse of "past failures"

on the fact that you are still dwelling in your "discouragements"

i give up....

on your indifference, be it the natural or the spiritual.

on your stubborness to stay in comfort zone.

on you turning a deaf ear to all the teachings, advices and His Word.

i give up....
totally,

the soft approach, the harsh scoldings as well as the friendly method.

But, nothing can beat the stagnation of the entire group.

i give up, just do what you want.

from the King Himself.....

He says:

"Ask and it shall be given, Seek and you shall find, knock and it will be opened up for you.

You shall be the head and not the tail...

Do not hide your talent, but use it to the fullest that you can.

I am not just a God, but an extrordinary God. So, my children shall do extraordinary things.

Its not abt skills, its abt how close we are, how far we go can in this relationship, how much you obey & sacrifice for Me, how well you run this race. Its abt how much time we spent together. "

His thoughts are so much higher than mine, so why should i presume that THIS is it??

He has given me a talent, and i should use that talent to the best of my ability. No hiding, no burying.....

So,


DEVIL, get thee behind me in Jesus' name!

Amen. :)

from the devil himself......

he says:

"You have the talent, but its redundant, so why use it, may as well just be a normal cgl, a good wife and a future good mother.

There is no need for you to fight your way thru your destiny. God may have given you a great destiny but there are so many others that have the same talent as well, so why fight for it. Just be normal. Stay average.

You CANT do it alone, so if there is no one else joining you, forget it gal. You cant do it well, alone.

Its abt SKILLS remember? Thats why you learnt so much. Its abt the surface, abt how the whole band sounds, abt who sang out, who was flat. Its the skills that you should be concern abt.

You CANT grow, so why still fight?? No pt.

Yes, you should be jealous, and if you want to fight, fight to let others see how well you are, how capable you can be.

See how left out you are now? Others are doing so well now, but you? ..........

So,


BURY that talent and just be a NORMAL, average christian lah. "

Must be a Singaporean devil. ops....

why am i so hurt?

Why am i so hurt? Why do i feel so sad? Why is my heart so painful?

I have spoken to him, i have prayed for/with him, i have encouraged him, i want to listen to him,

BUT...

he doesnt want to tell me, he refused to answer my sms, he refused to really talk to me, he refused to tell me anything.

I can only guess, but will my guessing go anywhere?

He didnt even say 'Bye' that day.

I see him saved, disciple him, rise him up, but why?

Just cos of failures? cos of valleys in life? cos of disappointments? of cos of ego and pride?

i almost cried when i tot he is 'leaving'.

i cant imgaine if he ever 'leaves'....

Sigh, really HURTS me to see him like this. So painful.. so so painful.

.........

not satisfied (pt 2)

I learnt that its NEVER really abt the skills, its never really abt the appearance, neither is it abt how you dress.

Its abt the time you spent with Him, those time you gone thru a rough patch but still you hang on there, knowing that your King will come to save you.

Its abt those nights when you were far too discouraged to go anywhere, except seeking Him, and He leads you to higher grounds, to your destiny.

I learnt that its never abt the surface in the KOG, its abt flow, abt His presence. I need to be more C, more D. :I

I dont want to depend on my own ability becos its never going to go anywhere in His kingdom.

I want to depend on HS, always depending on Him. Alongside with Him. :)

Adult Camp (some pics)

not satisfied...

Yes, i am not satisfied with where i am at all. I could have done more. I should have done more. I need to do MORE.

I am afraid of losing it. I dont wanna take it for granted. I wanna work for it.

But i feel that i am losing it somehow.

I asked him that question : Will we know if we lose it??

I am scared and i worried that one day, He will take it away from me.

God, pls dont.

Yao Ming and Phelps.....

Also dunno since when, i start to like watching Olympics.... my 2 heros.....

Yao Ming
Stands at 2.29m
Should be the richest athelete in China now
Married his beloved who also stands at 1.9m (imagine their children...)
Claimed that he will love her and only her alone..

* Admire his talent in BB and his faithfulness towards his wife.

Phelps
Rare talent in swimming
Has a body shape that is perfect for a swimmer
Has a num of role models to follow and motivate
Fast and swift in swimming
No need to fight if you are going for the same competition as him. haha..

* Admire his talent and hard work, but not his cockyness... boo...

And of course salute to Feng TW for doing SG proud lah.. good job! :)

sick again???

yes i am sick again.. and why am i sick AGAIN??

Really need to take care and be in good health...

Dont want to be sick again....

i gained 4..

booo... and yes, i officially gianed 4 kg in yr 2008... sianz...
when can i drop those 4... when??

its been a LONG time....

LONG time.....

一切完美

过去的批评嘲讽 Let it go let it go
过去的轻蔑冷落 Let it go let it go
有些人口不饶人
却忘了瞧瞧自己
又有什么资格
时刻都善良待人 Let’s move on let’s move on
时刻都做好本分 Let’s move on let’s move on
有些人心思浅薄
绝不是宽容
自暴自弃的理由
也许
确实也受过言语打击
也许
从来也没什么好际遇
千万别将勇气深锁在阴影里
我们又不会妨碍这世界继续美丽

我知道我变漂亮了 我知道我被注意了
曾难过 曾失落 微笑一下就过
外在的美貌容易戳破
内在的美好细水长流
我知道我变漂亮了 我知道我也豁达了
不自卑 不埋怨 就算还剩一点点
用内涵弥补一切缺陷
内在的美
迷住每个人的眼
用内涵弥补一切缺陷
内在的美
迷住每个人的眼

Overnite cycling : 27th June 08

Well, we met with 2 major hindrances.

1) our double bike's chain snapped in the mdist of cycling, so we gotta quickly find a replacement bike if not CY and Ivan cant follow us le. But it was near 11pm liao and all bike rental shops should be closed liao.. Thank God for SK, he dashed to one of the potential bike shops to C C and true enuff still open! Thank God! We quickly rent one double bike and carried on with our cycling.

We went to a few places and ate sth at Lavender Food Centre, travelled to flyer, kallang river (where the body was found.. eee), some wulu wulu place, padang, supreme court area.

2) And just when we were starting to travel to chinatown, MY tyre burst!!I heard a sssssssss sound and i knew, thats it. tyre burst liao.. We were at city hall area, in the end everyone decide not to continue the journey but WALK back from city hall to east coast! They wanna accompany me, i was touched, really.. :) It is definitely NOT easy to walk from central back to east coast. Truly indeed we walk for 3 hrs b4 we reach back east coast.

It was 6plus am by then liao.. we walked from 3plus am to 6plus am.. VERY tiring ...everyone has that positive spirit to carry on when i was like.. dying liao..

So thats our nite cycling exerience. Many situations cropped up, but i tot it was still fun, going to diff places to see see and look look and eat eat. haha..

Wun mind going again if can find ka-khis! haha..

THANK YOU ALL for walking with me...Really appreciate and lets go cycling again soon! :)

Thanks SK and Wei Chuan for helping and guiding us.

Thanks Rebecca for having the good team spirit!

Thanks E291 for being there with me! :P

You mean I am pregnant??

This happens in MRT this morning.

Goodness… A lady, out of kindness, wanted to give up her seat for me. She kept using her hand gestures to indicate that I need the seat and of course, I keep using my hand gestures to reject her. The thing is, why did she give up her seat for me? Well, got a few possibilities:

1) I look pregnant to her!
2) I am so fat that I look pregnant!!
3) I keep doing an action, showing that my legs are really tired after standing for quite some time.

Hm, hopefully it’s the 3rd one la. :P

But I was sad leh… I went to toilet to take a look again and I really don’t think that I look pregnant ma.. sigh..

Its an insult lor.. :I

No, I can’t convince myself.

I am not able to convince myself til now. Why should I do it when I am not even confident of maintaining it? I don’t want to be in debts, I want to be debt-free. Very free.

Spending what I have and not what I don’t have is a silly thingy to do. :I

Why force yourself to collate money tis month, so that you can pay for next month’s debt? Why not just use what you have, and when you don’t have, don’t use. I don’t think as of now, I am able to maintain, so I wont do it.

Things……………………………. I want to do. (Pt 2)

5) Go MOS / St James / Zouk – finally… 5th June :)

She used to…

1) Cook for the whole family even tho the food didn’t taste as nice as his.

2) Wake up really early in order to prepare breakfast, even tho she was on overnight work shift and sleep was obviously insufficient.

3) Help me wear socks and tie shoes laces until I was Sec 2. Hee..

4) Changed my wet clothing to dry ones at School canteen whenever it poured in the morning.

5) Always wake me up for school, no matter how rude and angry my reaction was to her. (because I want to sleep! Hee.)

6) Wait for me overnight until 6am in the morning during my rebellious dating days.

7) Bring me to toilet every single night after my leg operation. (could be up to a no of times per night! Blame it on the bad bladder. Ops..)

8) Bring me water and wake me up to take medicine in the middle of the night whenever I am sick.

9) Cook lots of tonics for me because she thought I was very skinny and under-nourished.

10) Boil hot water for me to bathe and even blow-dry my hair after bathe. (well, no water heater when I was growing up and I used to go home really late at night as a teenager.)

She gave birth to me, took care of me, but what have I done to / for her:

1) I snapped at her whenever she nags.

2) I was rude to her and slammed the door on her when she tell me off for mistakes I have done.

3) I ignored all her calls on mobile and don’t want to return them.

4) I ignored the fact that she waited whole night for me as she was worried for my safety. I rebelliously went out until LATE.

5) I didn’t really bring Salvation to her.

6) I didn’t care for her.

7) I allow her to suffer and just allow her to serve me.

8) I didn’t accompany her to the market on Weekends, knowing that she may need help.

9) I didn’t treasure / cherish her.

28th May 2002 marks the end of her life. I have miss her for 2,192 days. If I can start all over again, I will take great care of her, treasured her and bring Christ to her. If only I can..

Things……………………………. I want to do.

1) Run my own fashion boutique
2) Get a license and buy my favorite pink Beetle
3) Have courage to give birth
4) Travel to an ang-moh country
5) Go MOS / St James / Zouk
6) Shop like its FREE!
7) Slim down. Slim down!
8) Multiply my group 3 ways!

But why didn’t i?

1) – No money, no resource, only dream and passion.
2) – Too expensive bah. But I think Beetle is really stylo. Simply love it!
3) – More fun coming my way without being a mother? No lah, only excuses! The truth is… I am scared of PAIN… wah….
4) – Well, saving… I DON’T wanna go to asian country for long holiday again.
5) – For what??
6) – If only I am Paris Hilton…
7) – Hard la!
8) –I can only P.U.S.H!

tHe iNneR hIM…

Well, he can laugh loud at a joke, carry a BIG and WIDE smile whenever he is with people, has deep and manly voice when he talks, but is a man of few words and even expression at times.

But, just when I thought that this IS his character and his personality, he impresses me with the other side of him – the inner him. That night, I don’t know for what, we just talked about the future of our country. To my amazement, he started to talk, and he talk and he talk. Well, a saying goes:”Empty vessel makes most noise.”, but even though ‘talkative’, it was of substance and not an empty vessel obviously.

I used to think that only gadgets draw great interests in him. Or maybe ships and their structures as well. However it wasn’t the case. Just hear from him and his views and you will know that its something of substance, someone with personal views of his country and people.

Well, I am impressed in fact, even though towards the end, I yawned and didn’t showed much interest, I was very much impressed by him alone. I must say that even after many years being together, there will still be many more things for one to discover about their other half. At least I discover more about him when it comes to politics. Not brain-dead, but brain-active!

tO mY bEsTieS : 一个像夏天一个像秋天

(you know who you are.. :P )

第一次见面看你不太顺眼
谁知道后来关系那么密切
我们一个象夏天一个象秋
天却总能把冬天变成了春天
你驮我离开一场爱的风雪
我背你逃出一次梦的锻炼
遇见一个人然后生命全改变
原来不是恋爱才有的情节
我不会相信

如果不是你
朋友比情人还死心塌地
就算我忙恋爱
把你冷冻结冰
你也不会恨我只是骂我几句

如果不是你
我不会确定朋友比情人更懂得倾听
我的弦外之音
我的有口无心
我离不开darling更离不开你

hOt!

You wont believe it man. Weather nowadays are getting from bad to worst! Ai yo…

I was walking to MRT this morning and by the time I get there, I was sweating like crazy leh.. Already wearing sleeveless and I have short hair somemore, but still sweating like crazy! Haha..

When I board the train, I looked ard and realized many others, like me, were taking out a piece of tissue and wiping off their sweat. Got 1 aunties lagi funny lor… she stood in front of me, after dunno how many stops, I already cooled down, she is still wiping her sweat! Cos she sweating non-stop!

Thank God that I stood under the air con and it was blowing cool air at me. *Happy!*

Now you can be at home, brushing your teeth and you already perspire liao. And I wonder how, I wonder what I shld do if ever 1 day my aircon broke down!

Ahh…. Crazy ah….

When will you ever get it?

Yes, when will you ever get it?? Why must I keep reminding you of the little things? His Word clearly states that “Be faithful in little and more will be given.” Don’t you want more? Or are you shrinking responsibility? Or could it be you don’t want more to be responsible?

U almost gave up on yourself and wanted to leave Him, I persuade, I consoled, I encouraged, I help… I really tried to help. But why?

Arent you tired of me having to push you every single time? You aren’t tired, I am tired. You have the potential but why give your chance up? You gave “valid” reasons, but why give them in the very 1st place? Don’t you want to do more for the Lord?

Apparently, you aren’t hungry AT ALL. Apparently, you don’t really care. Why make it so obvious?

You have your reasons, but to me, they will never be valid reasons.

When will you ever get it??

calLiNg.

If it’s God’s calling for you, why cheapen that calling? Why take that calling for granted? Why don’t you treasure such calling. Why must you give up just because you faced with some disappointments and setbacks? We are only as strong as our weakest link. Are you just THAT strong?

Pls don’t give up.

gOoD fRenS…

“Good friends?"

Someone recently sarcastically said out these 2 words. I know where he is coming from and I think we are all on the same side of the boat.

I begin to think “What is a good friend?”

Someone that sings K box with you, go CNY countdown or Xmas gathering during the happy days?

Or some one that accompanies you drink til you are dead drunk at Zouk?



Good friend should be there for you when you are happy, when you are promoted, when you are doing well. Good friend should also be there for you, when you are sack, when you are dump, when your grandma passed away and you are there for the wake. When your mum is very sick and you keep asking out of concern, how is everything for the mother. Good friend is when on your wedding day, he/she will make a pt to attend even tho he/she has an impt CCA to attend. (We can have CCA activities every week/month, but wedding is ONCE a lifetime.) Good friend is one that is understanding and not always coming up with his/her logic based on their own understanding.

I am sick and tired. Really tired of this term “Good friend”, because true friends don’t mind whether they are being introduced as “Good friends” or not.

Juz that SimPle. :I

Its just that simple.

The bible says “Ask and it shall be given.” But I didn’t fully understand this. Why didn’t I ask earlier? Why did I assume that it will be given to me just because I thought it was a gift from Abba? Never assume, never take for granted, just because you may be born with it, but as long as you don’t humble yourself before the Lord to ASK, you will never have what you want.

Truly, He is simple, His principles are never really complicated. Often, it is man that makes things complicated. Why did I make this whole thing so so complicated?? Blaming on others, thinking that its never my fault but others that cause such LONG delay.

Now, maybe it is too late, maybe not. I don’t know. But I regretted not opening my mouth to ask from Him IN THE VERY FIRST PLACE.

Just that simple.

You want prosperity? Ask God for it. You want promotion, work hard and ask God for it.

It will come.

You want growth, don’t just sit there and wait for it to happen. It will not happen. You need to work hard and pray for growth!

So, why didn’t I think about it? :I

Cabbing (new season) – crapping time :)

Hey hey!, not too bad leh, I used to take cab to work almost every single day.. *cry ah…*, but this week I very guai leh… took cab to work for only 1 day! Applaud! APPLAUD PLEASE!!Haha..
“Uh-hm. Firstly, I want to thank my father, and my mother……….”

EGGS flying over…

“Come down lah! Still thank! Only ONE day also want to show off?? Ai yo…”

Well, maybe some of you are thinking this way now, BUT, don’t like dat lah, it’s a good beginning mah, right? Right?

Hee, I will add oil to completely NOT take cab to work and I believe with all the power I collect from Sky, Earth and Human Power, it is POSSIBLE!!!

*GRIN* *GRIN*

My Precious

Now I know how it feels to sacrifice your precious for someone you love. Its your precious, yet you are giving it for someone you love. Its kinda mix feelings.

At first you feel your heart pains, you feel unwilling to sacrifice cos its so precious, it contains sentimental values and its given by someone that is so so closed to you, but yet you know that you need to sacrifice.

You know you need to sacrifice that precious for this Person that you truly love and worship. You know that in Him, there will be no short changing, in Him, all that sacrifices made, He knows, He appreciates, and most imptly, He rewards. Some people cant see the point that this Man rewards back when we make a little sacrifices for Him. I don’t want to be like them, I don’t want to be spiritually myopic, but I want to be spiritually far-sighted. :)

When you sacrificed your precious, knowing that it is for your loved One, you will then do it willingly, because you can give without loving, but you can never love without giving. :)

I have now given my precious Lord, you will do the rest.

aNoTHeR OnE, iNto hAPpILy eVer AftEr…

Yes, another one, just stepped into the “Happily Ever After” path. I feel happy for her. Of course. After all we are long time OLD friends… Lol. :P

Knew her since sec 1, become so much closer from Sec 2 til now.. Hmm.. has been 13 yrs! Wow…

And now that she is married, I cant help but feel happy for her. The couple went thru a lot I must say and its definitely not easy for them but yet they still held onto each other til now – 99mths!

Now that they are married, all I can say is early give birth to son and wishing them white head support til old. (read these in Chinese bah! :P)

ah nei ha seh yo!! :P

Ah neh ha seh yo! Dinner with pst tonite was really a good time. Though most of the food ordered by pst were BEEF... and i dun dare to take beef, it was still good lah.. keke... Food wise wasnt very fantastic leh.. plus i tot its going to be buffet but it wasnt...

Well, the main reason why we are there eating wasnt becos of the food or the ambience (well, there isnt any, haha), but it was a good time to fellowship with pst and Victor.. Always good to make an effort to spend time with our mentors. :)

Although halfway the focus point was shifted from Ping to me on job switching, it was ultimately back to her again on searching for that Ru Yi Lang Jun for her. Be it XX or YY or even ZZ, she all dun want... "ai ya, dont be too picky la Ping." said her brother-in-law. Well, I dont think it's she picky, but probably there is no one near to her criteria. Spore dont have, US too far! haha... Ai ya choose Thomson la! Got car, got career, got muscle, got God, very good! haha!! :P

Anyhow the more we can treat pst and victor the better it is! We want to always honour our leader! :)

uPdATes...

I promise my bestest-es that i will update my blog no matter what. So here i am again, updating this BLOGGY thingy on a Saturday night. If you look at my last post, its about 1 week plus ago. Wat have i been doing all these while? BUSY with work lor.. past 2 weeks have been peak for me man... haha.. almost dont even have time to msn during work man.. Ops... dont tell anyone that i msn during work k? keke..

Have been very stress over work as well. On top of that, my long time fren, A-mei getting married soon too and I am the coordinator for her wedding! Ahhh... Kill me bah.. so many things to do man.. But i guess its all good. Good training ground for me to cope with stress to max, busi-ness to max and some group of people that I need wisdom to handle, with care. Hee..

Anyway, this is my updates as of now. Bye. :)

The Comparison :I

You busier or I busier? Does it matters? You got more work to do or I got more work to do? Why must you compare? Already we are helping you and yet you are not happy because its not settled yet and seems to be very messy. Why? Be a bit more thankful please. Cant we just help each other out??

Sadz… (shake head)

WORK!! :I

BUSY! BUSY!

Soooo many things to do.. When can I finish all my work?? But then again, if work can be finished, its not call WORK. Muahha..

So, stop complaining and get back to WORK! :P

V-day (Pt 2)

14th Feb : Hubby and I specially set aside this day.. but not for ourselves.. Its to spend Vday with our common group of friends.. They know who they are lah.. haha..

We went Timbre that night. Arrived at near 8pm.. Ordered some food.. Interestingly, the food that I ordered - Fish & Chips, was prepared and done up 'lovingly'! haha.. Cos they used chilli sauce to write "Love U" and the breaded fish is a heart-shape one! At 1st i dunno, until the food arrived then we all realised they put in a lot of effort leh.. haha..

Halfway thru...... came 2 Special VIP.. haha.. Alex and Howard... Somehow they were there. So we got them to joined us too..

It was Jk's bday celebration too.. keke.. We even got the band to sing him a bday song!.. It was good BUT... only that the timing of presenting cake and song.. er.. a bit not tally leh.. haha.. maybe cos the band didnt know we got a cake for him bah.. well, nvm it was good too.. think this yr's bday celebration much better than last yr's one.. hee...

Ping got him a Tee from Buffalo.. Hmm the T shirt is very him leh.. hee.. Hope he likes it la.. keke..

Then, both Cheryl and Sheryl came too.. we all ordered sides and more drinks too.. and just chatted the night away.. keke..

I must say that even without a love companion, you can still have a good vday celebration.. keke..BUT.. its still not good to be alone la.. so for those out there not attached, quickly go find one! Yes, Cheryl... talking abt YOU... muhahhaha... (just kidding lah.. )

Anyhow, i think we all have enjoyed that night.. Thanks guys and gals!! :)

Happy V-Day....