Me : A handicap

Hm, am i consider one? Not self-pitying of cos, but trying to come to reality (if i am one).

Many, really too many, dont know that i am a handicap person. My besties wont agree with me at all, but well, depends on how you see it. :)

I am born with a slight deformity whereby my left knee cap doesnt look normal. In fact, it looks a bit deform. :) and i walk with a limp, becos i didnt have a pair of balance legs. My left leg is 1 - 1.5cm shorter then my right one. :)

I also don’t have strength on my deform leg. This is why i walk with a limp. J

My mum noticed my limping when i was 11 and decided to send me for operation at a young age of 12. So, i have went thru an impt op and i thought it was kinda fun! Hee... well at such an age, you wont really know much abt danger of an op anyway. :)

Since then, i have a (i think) 12cm long scar (look like a centipede!) on my left knee cap. And its becos of this, since the age of 12, i already know how it feels to be REALLY looked at by passer-by and strangers. It sure didnt feel good. :(

Since then, i didnt want to wear anything that is above my knee cap. Definitely not shorts or short dresses. NOW, you know why i dont wear short dress and shorts and mini skirts le bah. Definitely a NO-NO unless there is leggings. :)

Some said that i shld have more confidence, while some said that i shld just show it normally. Thanks for all the advice and encouragements, but not many have gone thru my kind of feelings and thus i think not many can really talk me out of THIS. :) Not blaming anyone, not in self-pity, its just that i arent comfy to show it. Hmmm, i think it has also become like a habit, that is so so in me liaoz...

When i was 15, i innocently showed it to my bf (then), thinking that since he loves me, love will cover all fears. Well, he broke up with me the very next day. And its the lamest reason i can ever hear in my life. *GRIN*

I dont tell a lot of ppl, and i am definitely VERY secretive & quiet on this area. I dont like ppl to ask becos i dont want ppl to know. BUT....

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i have decided to tell you becos i am prepared to let ppl know now. Well, after-all, it is suppose to be normal right? :P

This is also the reason why:

- i dont swim (there is NO strength on my left leg)
- i dont do much sports
- i dont run (i mean really run)
- i walk with a limp at times and i am not aware of it.
- i dont wear high heel shoes often
- i must sit down wherever i go, becos i am relying only on 1 leg's strength. (am i handicap or wat?? hahaha)
- i can NOT take stairs - becos since i only have the strength of a single leg, you believe it or not, i cant go down stairs like normal ppl do becos this requires strength of 2 legs and i dont have.




The Bible says that God created man in His image and we are the apple of His eyes. I know there must be reason why i am born with this. I dont hate it, i dont hate God (in fact, have never), i dont blame ppl (not even my parents). In fact, i am very thankful to God that i still have the strength of my right leg (thats y when we have sport outings with Pst and zone, i go.)

This has indeed reminded me that i am to always lean on God and not my own strength.

Amen. :)

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I miss you all....

Yup, i miss you all and really miss lots! ha... i am referring to my ex-cg members...

esp those that were with me for quite some time..

But hor i realised that no one asked me out after i moved over to W232 leh... lagi more SADZ man... sigh.... i hate to think that after a person is not in same cg anymore, then there is no more frenships liaoz??

Ai yo, dont like dat leh.. can still go out tog ma. :I

ah-ling
HL
Ivan
LV
Boaz (haha)
Lee Hom
MX
YT

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V-Day @ 14th Feb 09

This year's V Day was fun and funny. haha...Well, i posted the pics in fb too, so you can go take a look.

14th Feb 09

Wanted to wake up at 9.30am, to prepare and doll myself up and for THE occassion, BUT, in the end, (haiz), we woke up at 11am lor! ai yo yo.... sleep til so late...


Anyhow, we dilly-dally until abt 12.30pm then go out lor...



And MK lagi best, didnt make reservations on one of the intended restaurants, so in the end we didnt managed to go there. We went to NYDC @ Wheelock's place. I like it there too la. Hee, not too ex and not too class. You know lah, too class place hor, you eat also feel funny.. hee...


He ordered some pizza with sausages and mushrooms on it and i ordered Grilled Dory with flavoured rice (the rice not much flavour leh, ha). Both our dishes are nice! BUT.... after we ate, MK has stommy pain and made good frens with the public toilets at Taka. I also felt my stommy 'grooo---grooo...", but then i was busy shopping , so i kinda ignored the 'grooo---groo...' (*GRIN*) .



But still it was good lah. :) Oh, he gave me Nike (or Addidas??) sports bra - err think can say ba... hee cos some of you might know that i started gym-ming recently and with sports bra, it will be better. :) I like it and will use it! Thanks dear... Muacks....


As for me leh.. buy le but haven give yet cos its at someone's place and not convenient to go collect. (HEE...) Anyway, i told him that watever i give him, he must accept it, haha.. a bit 'controlling' hor.. err.. but dun care, he just gotta accept it. hahah... ai ya, he will grow to like it one lah... its sth in line with what Pst Kong preached today! hahaha... :)



Anyhow, we went to JK's hse to celebrate Vday together with, Cheryl, Huifangy, Yanping and Mingli and it was fun and funny!! hahaha... You can see my fb pics for more details...

But but, i still want to say a bit bit over here.. keke...









We wanted to take a pic with all of us in so we decided to use the timer. So MK was IC of making sure we all fit in, so that he can press the button once we ready. So got 1 pic, he pressed the button alrdy and quickly run back to position, but afterhe did that, haha, he s.l.o.w.l.y fall rightside down unto the floor!! Like a bump like dat! haha.. its was pretty funny...........hahaha...

And the thingy is that JK wanted to grab him to prevent him from falling, but given MK's size and JK's size, THAT plan just didnt work out!!



And then, before we all know it, (i think) me, yp, cheryl and rong were LAUGHING like mad!! i laughed and laughed until i cried lor! ai yo... it was just so so funny... Think we took another 5mins to cool ourselves down before we 'try' to take another one again.


The 2nd time worked but me and Rong were still laughing. So we gotta try to control our laughter, then we take the pic, but towards the end, rong couldnt take it anymore and she burst out laughing AGAIN! hahahahaha...


But anyhow, we managed to take a decent one (with my face all red and bloated, ha!)


It was fun la... and funny.....................



Happy Vday to all! :P

19th bday pressies...

Okok, i TRY to recall all my birthday pressies received this yr k?

I received: (not in order of price, etc..)

- (coming soon.... )Blackberry Phone (Hubby)
- FCUK watch (YP & HF)
- A bouquet of roses (Hubby)
- Cotton-on dress (Mingli)
- Mango Voucher (JK & Rong)
- Purple Stocking from Mphosis & Anna Sui Lip gloss (Sheryl & Xinhong)
- Marjolie Marscara (Meiyan)
- Charles & Keith Silver sports shoes (MX)
- Cute looking radio (Jessie)
- Marjolie Liquid eyeliner (Kit)
- Big Big cup that can contain cup noodles (Charlynn)
- Faceshop's nail polish and nail care (Melisa)
- Cute Book shelves divider (Wei Ying)
- Nike pink sports shoes (VIC Zone)
- Sporty Baby-G watch (Wu Xia)
- Charles & Keith White formal bag (N119 - ex-cg)
- Very delicious chocolate cake from Cedele (SOT gang)
- (coming soon....)Crab Feast - Brother
- And so many many bday sms & fb wishes from various friends!

Wow... what can i say? I am BLESSED! Thank you so much for thinking of me and loving me as your friend. Really, thanks! :P

Happy 19th Bday to me! (ops.. :P )